| | | | читать дальшеESQUIRE: Things are good.
SCOTT CAAN: Yeah.
ESQ: Twelve million people.
SC: I think something like that.
ESQ: Did you expect this?
SC: With the hype and everything, I think ultimately we expected the show to do even better.
ESQ: You sound disappointed. Are you worried about getting picked up? Seems if Outsourced gets picked up, then you have a good shot. [It's since been picked up. —Editors]
SC: If what?
ESQ: Outsourced.
SC: I don't know what that is.
ESQ: What made you decide to do Hawaii Five-0?
SC: I read the pilot and I'm like, This has promise and isn't stupid. This is some of the best stuff I'll be able to have done.
ESQ: Better than your movies?
SC: I'm kind of like the goofy number-seven guy in a lot of movies. So I say yes [to doing the show], then the anxiety starts. I'm like, What have I done? And I go crazy because I fancy myself a tortured artist. I'm the guy who'll be in the one-bedroom with the coffee and a cigarette. And I don't smoke.
ESQ: No offense, but have you ever had to live in a one-bedroom? You've had a relatively charmed life.
SC: No. I'm just saying I don't want to sell out. I want to struggle and make films. It's not a financial thing, it's more of a who-I-am thing. I'm glad that you said that because now I'm in a place where I'm like, What an asshole I would be not to ride the wave and be appreciative.
ESQ: Is making a TV show harder than making a movie?
SC: We're making an hour every single week. It feels like I'm constantly doing an independent movie that we didn't prepare for.
ESQ: But you're in Hawaii.
SC: I'm a malcontent when it comes to art. I don't want to sound pretentious, but you could hire a bunch of monkeys to be on a TV show, and if it's successful, then everything's perfect and everybody's happy. But when you hire people that give a shit and they want to make good art — I don't want to say art and TV show in the same sentence because I sound like a jerkoff — you're going to have unhappy people, because they want to make it better.
ESQ: How would you make the show better?
SC: If it was up to me, if I had the reins, I'd try to do an episode where there's no case.
ESQ: They do seem to have the formula down: Throw you guys in a weird situation, something crazy happens, and then your partner says, "Book 'im, Danno."
SC: Simplify it some more so I can jump out a window.
ESQ: Did you worry that as an actor — sorry, artist — people wouldn't respect you as much if you were on TV?
SC: Does that sound pretentious?
ESQ: No, I'm an artist, too.
SC [laughing]: You pretentious fuck. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. My dad talked about it with me when he did his show [Las Vegas]. He was like, "Are they going to not respect me?" Are you nuts? Because you want to take care of your family? And that's where I'm at — I don't even have a family, and so I struggled with, well, why I am doing this now? And the answer was because, dude, when someone throws you a fastball down the middle, hit that shit.
[Caan leans back and bumps his hand against a post.]
SC: Ow. Fuck.
ESQ: You all right?
SC: No. I have something [on my hand] and just banged it.
ESQ: Your dad never would have said that.
SC: Said "Ow"? No, no chance. I'm sensitive, dude.
ESQ: That surprises me, because I was a little intimidated coming into this. You always play such a hard-ass.
SC: Here's the thing: I've always fancied myself a tough guy. I grew up scrappy. Ultimately, I think that's a little bit of a front that I had no choice but to follow.
ESQ: Because of your dad?
SC: My dad's genuinely one of the toughest people on the planet. He wasn't playing that part. That's him. If I cried about something, it wasn't "Hey, stop crying." It was "What is that? What are you doing?"
ESQ: What's with slicking back your hair all the time?
SC: I watched The Outsiders when I was 12, and I was like, That's who I want to be.
ESQ: You know, I wouldn't be as scared of you if you had a different haircut.
SC: The only other things I've ever done are shave my head bald and wear a Mohawk. [My hair] just wants to go back.
ESQ: Do you think this is your time as an actor? You have a different appeal than the current breed of guys out there. You're not like Robert Pattinson.
SC: Who?
ESQ: Robert Pattinson. The vampire guy. The Twilight guy.
SC: I don't know who he is.
ESQ: But you get my point?
SC: I feel like I would have been more successful 30 years ago, because I think what people are interested in has changed. But are you saying doing television?
ESQ: No, not at all. Just your personality, your look, what you bring to a role, it's really different from new actors in general.
SC: I'm going to take that as a compliment.
ESQ: It is. Do you get in fights anymore?
SC: If I get in a fight at 35, I'm going to be pissed. I'm at art functions and charity parties. It's not like I'm hanging out at the Tunnel and shit.
ESQ: Which of us do you think has cried the most recently?
SC: I guarantee it's me.
ESQ: I'm having trouble thinking of the last time I cried. I should've prepared better for that question.
SC: In the last few weeks not so much, but in the last year...
The Appendix: How to Photograph Naked Women, by Scott Caan
Nine tips gleaned from our conversation with actor Scott Caan:
1. Temporarily reside in a hotel.
2. Date an uninhibited artist type.
3. When she asks you "How come you never take photos of me?" say, "It's just not my thing."
4. When she insists, take out your camera.
5. Use any available light. Use the hotel-room lamp if you have to.
6. Pick the right pose. "The idea is to come up with something that you find beautiful. Sometimes something raunchy is something beautiful to somebody, but to me, that's not it."
7. Don't force it. "Anything you shoot photos of, it's what you keep in the frame. You look at something, and if you really want to take a photo of it, take a photo of it. The second you start adjusting things and making it work, that's when it becomes photography as a job, and that's just not my style."
8. Call ten female acquaintances and ask them, "Hey, can I shoot photos of you?"
9. Repeat process with each. |